PICK A HANDJanuary 11, 2013
You know what they say about big hands?
I'm not sure what you just answered with... but you know one thing they don't say about big hands?
That you cannot fit big hands in a Pringles can.
What's up with that? I like potato chips, I do, but give me a break with the little can Pringles people. I just want to sit on the couch and watch TV without interference from a bag of chips like the rest of America (and maybe Canada or anywhere else that watches TV from their couches). The trouble with the bags are they make too much noise which then causes me to turn the volume up louder and, since I'm crazy, my TV has to be on an even number level-wise so I have to turn it up two notches and if the kid is sleeping I may run the risk of waking her which then (this is the big one) will cause my wife to turn into a fire breathing dragon because I woke the kid. She'll leap across the couch engulfed in a fireball knocking the chips out of my hands and getting crumbs everywhere completely ruining our couch -and our evening- in the process.
For the love of... all of this could be avoided if I could fit my hands into the can of Pringles.
But I can't. I'm a man. I have large hands. I like chips. This is discrimination. Sort of. Maybe not.
Still though, I hate having to pour the stack of chips from the container into my hand balancing them like a Jenga tower in effort to eat a few. It's too much work. Make the containers larger. What? The can is designed that way so the chips don't break. I get that, but there has to be a workaround. Maybe you should make the chips larger, too...
Or I could just stop eating chips, it is the New Year after all, but I don't think either of us want that to happen. Except my wife. And maybe my waistline.
So the curiosity is killing me, what do they say about big hands? Who are they? And do they eat Pringles?
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